Pumpkin and the Cookie Scandal of ’21

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Pumpkin and the Cookie Scandal of ‘21

How does a moderately popular user trick dozens of other children and teenagers into making his comment the most liked in (recent) KidzNet history?

The answer: Cookies.

Who doesn’t love cookies? America alone consumes about 2 billion cookies each year, according to the South Florida Reporter. Top cookie consumers include Santa Claus, Cookie Monster, and this pig.

(Her name is Phoebe.)

Pumpkin, a long-time KidzNet user, knew how much people adore and crave cookies, and decided to use it to his own advantage.

OCTOBER 22nd, 2021, ~ 9 AM.

The new KidzNet is about 3 weeks old.

Romi330, or simply Romi, creates an innocent-enough post entitled “Want to break a record?” In the post, he challenges fellow users to like a comment below at least twenty times.

Not long afterwards, at 9:48 AM (timezone unclear), Pumpkin decides to comment.

His comment reads: “Like this comment for a cookie”, followed by a chocolate-chip cookie emoji like this one 🍪.

It rapidly garners attention, with comments from such users as Autumn at 10:46 AM, JD2005 at 12:05 PM, and Hilolo at 12:43 PM. All are eager for their promised cookies. The comment is also liked by many users, like Esie, Dash201, EloquentRacer92, and KidzSearch themselves. Pumpkin’s comment is soon pinned at his own request.

At the time of this post, the comment has been liked 24 times, making it the most liked of any KidzNet comment.

That is 2 dozen cookies.

And where are those cookies, you ask?

That is the same question that the other 23 of us have been asking for the past 3 months, and to which no one knows the answer. Except for Pumpkin.

We can still guess at the solution, however. Maybe they were all eaten. Maybe they were given to Santa at Christmas. (It is unclear at this time whether Pumpkin celebrates Christmas or not.) Or worst of all, maybe they never even existed. It is difficult to grasp such a devastatingly heartbreaking idea, but it is time that we faced the truth:

Pumpkin probably lied about the whole thing for likes.

Look at the sheepish expression on his fuzzy feline face.

(And yes, Pumpkin is a cat.)

This is the face of someone who knows they have single handedly lied to and let down tens of expectant people. Now the rest of us will have to gaze mournfully at our plates and glasses of milk, which will never hold warm, delicious, chocolate-chip perfection. Are you proud of your actions, Pumpkin?

Since this incident, as well as a few times before, the same cookie technique has been employed, but never to such a scale as this one.

At least we can enjoy Esie’s humorous and well-written stories about the life of a cookie to distract us. (Go check them out!)

(This post is just a joke.)

But seriously, where are our cookies?


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