Ugh. I got a bad headache and in a bad mood but here we go.

I know Attack Helicopter is a slight dark and offensive joke. That ended, im not a ❄ , i have a tough shell. So it has nothing to do with Gymnast. Also, you guys weren't correcting me, you were stating an opinion and I mine. But it has nothing to do with that but my school. Realityid different from online, im two months behind in school and I have a few weeks left before the finish line, or dead line.

Im only saying this because my sister told me that someone said it had to do with that. Im trying to tell myself I can do itl i can getaway from KS. And this has been going on for months if you've read my diary, ive been trying to get myself to leave. And In told posts when my memom died, I wasn't check in for a few months. So it started there, when my memom died. And also just my health, mentally and physically. So, God will lead me to a better path someday.

Also can someone teach me how to
write on a tablet?

Because false allegations of me "threatening to leave" was put up.

I have felt like KS made me numb and more isolated from the world. I would refresh the page multiple times before I got something new, and just sit there watching the screen. And it only isolated me from the world and made me more depressed when even a little of that numbness would go away because of how empty I felt.

It isn't because of "drama" because of my personal life. I'm taking a break for two months and you can't stop me. Hopefully, till then I'll feel better. But because of these allegations, I'm not even sure I want to go on in two months. I'm not one to threaten. I'm alone. And I just feel so empty, like there is nothing in my life. So please, don't tell me that "Oh you won't actually take a break, you'll be back tomorrow, she's just threatening to leave." Because that's causing me to look at my notification when I'm on the KT tab about to delete and I see that. And being honest, I go on here to feel happy. But lately, no matter the drama or not, I feel more alone and isolated from the rest of the world. Like I'm talking in a void of nothingness.

I love my friends, like @GemHeart and @lunamoonlight @JD2005 etc. But I just need to take and break, for now, just to feel again, so please don't start anything because that makes me go on more and it just makes me feel number to the world. It's nothing anyone did.

OK. Well, here it goes.

If you are reading my diary, then you know life is really not the best right now. Maybe ok, but not the best, I've had the worst days. I don't want to start drama by stating this. I have school and I'm depressed right now. Most days I'll just wake up and cry. Or cry in the bathroom. Or cry on a swing swung. And I feel like KS isn't helping, it's just a distraction and it's all just part of the numbing process. Another reason I won't be on like Summer this year is because of the amount of Tumblr I'm getting from here. It's just turning into a kid Tumblr. Everyday someone accuses me of being racist, homophobic, transphobic, and it doesn't stop. And I reckon this day and age it never will, it'll just get worse. Maybe because it's the fact our generation just is filled with these grown-up thoughts they become little drama queens themselves.

Anyways, I'm going to still be on KT but only for one reason, to post my short horrors. Well, nothing gruesome of course, kid scary stories. I won't be on (hopefully) till December. If I am on, it's to post in my diary. Y'all know nothing about my life, my "real" life. I've been struggling to just speak properly instead of like a child. I can, but for some reason, my mind doesn't want to. I act like a child, or I just change my characters. It's annoying everyone and I can't stop. My mind doesn't want to. I can't find the real me in my maze of faces.

If I'm going to reg. school you won't see me all year long. 2020 second semester, you might see me, but I'll try not to be on. If I'm online, don't get your hopes up, I'm either posting on my diary or I clicked on the tab. So, if you are my close friends, check-in my diary. Because I post sensitive stuff there, but I'm never judged there. I'm going to be on other websites, but you are not supposed to give names out so. For now, I'm just going to talk about different languages with baby boomers online because that's what life is. Going in the pit of your sadness hoping your tears don't drown you to death.

Any interaction will be on my stories. I'm wanting to start a long-awaited series for a while on there, with Silens I being gone I just need something to keep me going. Thanks for reading and pretty please, don't be rude because I stated my opinion on the current state of Gen y and KN (or KT).

"Our hearts are monsters, that's why our ribs are cages."